[NOTE: this is adapted from a letter to my family. E. Fox]
Dear Family,
A catchup note on my (impending) journey, moving
to California.
I rented a trailer to bring some furniture up to my son and sister who live in
Massachusetts. They came down to Connecticut to meet me at my daughter's house.
On the way up (Friday, March 4), my car came to a halt on the New Jersey
turnpike just before dark. I thought at first I had run out of fuel. I had
a gallon of diesel, and put that in the tank, but no go. And I could see
air bubbles in the fuel line coming from the fuel pump. The air bubbles
had happened once before and required a tow.
After about an hour, a cop stopped and radioed in for a tow truck, which came
after about 2-cold-hours-and-another-cop later. They towed me to a place near
Princeton. I stayed at a motel nearby, and returned next morning to the garage to see what
could be done for my car. Since there were air bubbles in the fuel line, we
thought it might be a leaky line. But they took almost all Saturday to find a
line that would fit. And -- that was not the problem.
So I had the car towed to the VW garage in Princeton, which they could not work
on til Monday, returned to the first garage (a U-Haul place), rented a truck and
continued on my way with furniture, where all were assembled awaiting my
"somewhat" late arrival. We had a good evening. It was good to see everybody, including all
six
cousins interacting. We loaded the furniture in my son's VW bus, and they took
off back for Massachusetts. I stayed til Monday and left at 5:30 am to get to
Princeton by 8 am when the garage opened.
A bit of background (I am a couple months short of 70): about 3 weeks or so ago, I notice that I was having wiggles
in my chest, but thought nothing of it. Then a week or so later, it happened
again, and I noticed that my pulse was erratic. I went to the emergency room
right away, and they gave me an EKG. The fellow agreed offhandedly, "Yes, you are missing a
few beats." He said it was probably benign and that I had probably had it for a
long time. I told him that just the day before I had climbed four sets of stairs
with no problem.
The ER info was sent to my doctor, but I had no real report by the
time I left for CT. So there I was in New Jersey with my chest occasionally twitching, no
doubt intensified by the stress of the car situation, but mostly by the panic
thought that I would not get my house packed by the time of the house sale closing just two weeks away.
I had planned to be back in Alexandria by Saturday night to get packing, and
here it was Monday, going on Tuesday, with no departure in sight. I had hired
two Ethiopian women to help with the packing, and was supposed to have them over
for the first time that Monday.
Back to the auto saga. They found that the starter was not working, probably
because I had had to use it so much trying to get the car to run (and it was
old), so they put in a new starter ($450 -- would have been half that any place
but a VW garage). Then we thought the car needed a new fuel pump, which they
found no one produced anymore, and declined to do any more on the car. Not that
they could have done much.
So Tuesday, I rented another U-Haul truck (by this time it was about 4 pm), and
a car dolly to bring the car back home. (I had called my mechanic in Alexandria
who said he could come up with a fuel pump.) I had to take the train from
Princeton to New Brunswick to pick up the truck, leaving my car at the VW place.
But the only car dolly in the whole state of NJ was an hour and a half down
south. I might have made it that night to pick up the dolly, as the lady there lived by the
U-Haul place and said I could come any time. But when I got off the train in New
Brunswick, the taxi came so late that the UH place was closed. So another night
in a motel.
(I had brought reading "just in case" there might be some down time. It
was a book on "chaos theory". Seemed appropriate to my circumstances.
Actually a very good introduction to the topic. So, my motel stays were
enlightened by reading about chaos, which is a misnomer. The subject is
really turbulence, which, it turns out, has a very distinct pattern of its own,
in all kinds of applications. But that is another story.)
Wednesday morning, I got the truck, and then the dolly (off in the
southern New Jersey version of piney woods, at an auto repair place at the end
of a long cow-path road, with signs along the side warning that trespassers
would be arrested -- I wasn't sure they didn't mean shot), drove back to
Princeton, and with the assistance of the VW folks, loaded the car on the dolly, and
took off for home. It was a beautiful sunny day....
All this time, the Lord was working on me. Big time. He just kept saying,
"Relax, I'm in charge of things." I thought more than once, "That's easy for You to
say...!" But the thought began to sink in that He might be right. Then the
message came through that He was far more interested in the kind of person I
turned out to be through all this trouble than in what I thought I was accomplishing for
Him. And then He said, "I have you right where you need to be to do your
growing." Well, all of this began to make sense (I have gone through this lesson
many times before...), and a powerful sense of freedom began (again) to infiltrate. My
whole attitude changed, I relaxed even about packing the house. I think that is
what is meant by "the peace that passes all understanding" -- when you trust and
obey. And my chest very much relaxed.
My doctor had some blood tests done, and reported that the problem seems to be a
hyper-thyroid condition, which upsets the timing of the heart. Not a heart
problem itself, apparently. Good news. So I am now taking beta-blockers. I
didn't know I had a beta. But if blocking it helps my heart know when to tick
and tock, so be it. We will see what that produces. For the most part, I feel
excellent. A bit less full of vim and vigor than 30 years ago, but not bad,
considering.
The two Ethiopian women turned out to be super workers, very sturdy and friendly. About
3/4 of the work is already done (one week before closing).
My Alexandria mechanic, however, said that the fuel pump was not the problem,
that there was a blockage in the fuel tank, but that the real problem was some
business with the crankshaft, which was worn, affecting the timing. No parts
available.
The time had finally come. So, I administered last rites to T-Top Rabbit and
buried it two days ago. A friend is loaning me a car for a few days. I will not
have to trailer a car behind my truck to California, a $600 boone. So I will pick up
another car when I get to California.
Two nights ago, just to keep things from getting boring, the buyer for my house
pulled into the driveway and informed me that his buyer had failed to qualify
for a loan, and thus could not buy his house, which meant that he could not buy
mine. So everything was back to square one. I would have to find another buyer.
Then he came in yesterday and said that the loan company was working with him so
that he could buy the house. Probably got a bridge loan to cover between when he
buys my house and when he can sell his own. But he cannot get his loan until
after the closing date listed on our contract, so I am not obligated to keep
this contract with him.
And, in the meantime, I have been getting suspicious that my house is actually
worth more (good grief!) than the $415,000 which I have been asking (bought it
for $185,000 six years ago). So, I am going to have my own assessment made. The
buyer does not want to tell me what his assessment of my house came to, which
raises questions. If his assessment of my house had been below $415,000, he
would be insisting on a lower price.
On the West Coast side of things, we have been trying for at least 3 months to
get a permit to put in a modular unit. The folks there at CCFM (Christian
Community of Family Ministry) just reported to me, that after all this time,
after they had wended their way to the top of the bureaucratic heap, some fellow
at the top informed them that any modular unit which is constructed for
commercial/industrial purposes will never be allowed on private property (must
be the non-commerical lobby not wanting the competition). So we are starting over for housing for
me. Probably will contact a non-commercial/industrial modular company to see
what they have to offer.
I have never been through a roller-coaster ride like this, and could well have
crashed at several points. And, there were other interesting events. I left a credit
card at the NJ Turnpike booth (and they don't even take credit cards!), and then a
ATM machine ate up my bank check card. Makes you a believer in spiritual
warfare. And it ain't over yet. But the Lord allows such things for our good.
Trust and obey is still the best advice around. But it seems you have to go
through the mill to get there. Let go and let God.
Hoping for a closing date before the end of April, but that remains to be seen.
Love to everyone, Dad/Uncle/Earle
PS: My M.D. niece is helping me to understand the mysteries of bladder stones, and
to find a doctor to get rid of them. More adventure -- hopefully before I leave
for CA.
PPS: The buyer sent me a copy of his appraisal of my house, which tallies with
my asking price, so we are closing on March 31. He is giving me until
April 16 to go on my trip to Trinidad,
and then pack up on the 16th.
PPPS: Anyone who would like to help load a truck on April 16th please
get in touch with me.
[COMMENT: I find I need to clarify why I wrote this piece.
It was not to point out how bad things were, but rather to point out, even though things can seem very bad indeed, God can draw us through and bring us out stronger and more healed and whole than when we went in. I found wonderful and surprising freedom as I listened to God's version of what was happening to me, and as I continued to thank God for testing me and probing deeply. Freedom to walk away from a little VW Rabbit which (in its various incarnations) had carried me some 340,000 miles over the last 20 years. Gloria Dei!]
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